You were thrust into my life like a wrecking ball through a building.
As if our world needed disruption.
You marched in taking charge, it didn’t matter that we didn’t know you.
We complied with your requests, dropped plans when you announced your scheme.
Necessary changes needed to occur to fit you in and we hesitated to allow you to cloud our itinerary.
We questioned your identity, your truth, and your ending point. We learned what we could to equip ourselves with necessary tools to work with you.
You gave our lives new meaning; you made us grow with this project.
You demolished our picture perfect façade.
You tore things up as you pleased, bulldozing and excavating our bodies inside and out.
We followed along as if you were our foreman.
Your list of demands forced change, good and bad.
We changed the way we did things to suit you, while dropping unneeded weight to defy you.
We didn’t know where the project was going, but we knew we couldn’t leave until it was complete.
Your plot, the only thing in our head at night, first thought in the morning.
We had a choice to make, foil or follow.
We embraced your presence as permanent.
Foiling your idea was our new trade.
Each day an opportunity to rebel, disobeying you with happiness, smiles, and awarded with badges of our fight against you.
In the end, we want all the praise for the job we completed, outshining your hold.
We accept the pain, our bodies designed to withstand you.
We allow weakness, for it only helps us improve.
We seek help and support, from those who knew you before us.
We built our own team for completing this mission.
A mission we didn’t want to be on, but now it’s etched forever in our makeup.
We further our developments by holding you with us.
Reminding ourselves we are the foreman in our lives, we build what we want with the tools we are given, we can handle the problems that appear, and reach out to others who can help us on our venture, and in the end construct a better world because you joined us.
You can leave when you want, your project is done, and our fight to break away from you will not end.
photo credit to Allicia Leaper
All of the posts written for Elephants and Tea are contributed by patients, survivors, caregivers and loved ones dealing with cancer. If you have a story or experience you would like to share with the cancer community we would love to hear from you! Please submit your idea at https://www.elephantsandtea.com/contact/submissions/.