Posts by Ruth Arnold

Patient, Metastatic Breast Cancer
My name is Ruth. I am a preschool special education teacher. I’m a widow with two sons. Both are sophomores. One is in college and one is in high school.
I first had stage 2 breast cancer in 2004. After 12 years, metastatic breast cancer was found in my liver. It was found peripherally as I was having another procedure. I remain symptom-free but of course this has been life-changing.
I have always been a writer of sorts but I find writing about cancer allows me to reveal that inner person that is never shared. In this way, I hope to clarify for people who know me what is inside of me besides the cancer but to also let others know that the struggle is ours. You are not strange but cancer gives you so much more to manage that you cannot always label and understand.
There is so much more to us besides trying to live in a physically healthy way. Spiritual health is a dynamic and challenging part of us now. We should not apologize for our darkness when it is present. We should not always flee from it. We should learn to understand what is inside of us besides the medical circumstances that we tolerate.

Apology from a Bridge

by Ruth Arnold November 9, 2021

I glanced at the text. The words “liver”, “enzyme” and “scans” popped out at me, and I wondered what they meant. In a nanosecond I thought back to my Thursday blood draw where my oncologist told me that my liver enzyme results had not come back yet.

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MBC Parasite

by Ruth Arnold December 16, 2020

It’s always there. Sometimes a whisper. Sometimes a touch. Sometimes a loud din that is hard to hear beyond. A hum. A bright overpowering visual. A darkening of my perspective so that it is hard to distinguish figures. But, always there.

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